Dominatrix, Escort or Bizarre Lady

Dominatrix, Escort or Bizarre Lady

Over the years I have fielded many calls from people seeking such things as massage or even sex. Well, it seems only obvious to me as a ProDomme, and maybe quite a few others out there, that I provide no such service. But there are many people who don’t understand exactly what a Domme does and how it differs from an escort or masseuse.

To clarify the issue let me explain that a Dominatrix, or Domme when female and Dom when male, is involved in providing a consensual environment for people to explore their Bondage and discipline (B/D), domination and submission (D/s), sadism and masochism (S/M) fantasies or fetishes. B&D, D&S, S&M or BDSM is a practice of trust and exploration
undertaken in a safe environment under pre-negotiated terms. While that sentence could be applied to an escort or masseuse there are other details that may help to differentiate, the easiest being that no sex is provided by a ProDomme.

Why does it matter? Well, as a ProDomme the answer is easy for me: I feel it undermines the value of the training,
education, skill, art and effort I put into my profession. But I feel on many levels it does the masses an injustice as well when they come to expect something from an experience and then don’t understand the inconsistencies between Dommes. Receiving a sexual experience from one Domme and not from another makes the individual uncertain of what the standard should be. Many read the disclaimers put into ads and onto websites as a facade for law enforcement
agencies.

I think the confusion begins when an amateur Domme steps into a pro setting and decides to start taking clients. She thinks it will be no different than when she tied up her last boyfriend during sex. Instead of becoming a ProDomme she should have considered becoming a kinky escort. This is a title I would like to see used more often in the USA as there
is a distinctive title for a woman who provides ‘professional kinky sex’ in other countries. This is where the title Bizarre Lady comes into play, and while I don’t see that title catching on here in the US, kinky escort would be easy to
understand and markedly separate from escorts and ProDommes. After all, it would be nice to have a clear dividing line between those escorts who are comfortable with fetishes and kinky sex and those who aren’t, and another between the kinky escorts and the ProDommes. While I have come across many amazing Professional Dominatrixes over the years I have come across even more who should be setting up shop in a hotel room and not a dungeon.

Each of these professions is necessary, though it would be nice if there were some clarity between services for those who seek out having their specific needs or interests met. I appreciate the difficulty an escort must have in explaining that they aren’t comfortable being tied up just because they’re being paid for it. In much the same way, a Domme has to be clear that they do not provide sex. Try and remember this the next time you are calling a Domme. You are more likely to have your balls put under lock and key then to use them for tea-bagging.

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